When our math teacher taught us that (-)(-) gives us a (+), i had never doubted its accuracy. But when this applies to life, the above statement is a large hoax. I'd like to interprete the 2 (-)s in this manner. The first (-) implies the unpleasant, distasteful experience that befall on us during our everyday lives. The second (-) connotes our individual responses towards the predicament. It does not take rocket science to explain a negative perception of any misfortune would never turn out to be a positive experience. So in life, lets refine the equation:
(-) x (-) = (-)
I'll let u do the other combinations yourself. But you get the point.
I've been trying to strike some positive, optimistic outlook in everything i do, my experiences, and my various attitudes towards the world around me. Sometimes the human mind wonders so uncontrollably that u would almost says it flirts around with the unwanted. Sometimes it really bothers me. Maturity. Am i or am i not?
Comparison leads to a dead end in itself. Competition is however essential for improvement. In competition there is inevitably comparison. Can a balance be sought? I dunno if blogging helps to unleash the sentiments pent up in me, cos i'm restraining it. Well, maybe i should stop adding more negatives behind the string of negatives.
Today there was a lesson on cyberbullying in school. Being a RT there, i was just wondering that if the above mentioned could add to the negative vibes of my readers, and hence contribute to some sort of cyber harrassment maybe?
This is getting really off tangent. I promise i will stop now.
February 29, 2008
February 06, 2008
答案？
A pretty long time before i last blogged. Now its CNY in the blink of an eye. Reminiscing the last two CNY i had, in 2006 it was the week before field camp, in 2007 i was still under the grip of NS duties. Now i am rather free, or u would say unbounded by any obligations to anyone. My life is entirely in my own hands. In my quest to fulfil certain goals at this stage, i've embarked on operation top secret, and of course some RT as well. But i must say that both have not yielded significant success so far. There are many challenges as well as avenues for expressions, but what i feel i sorely lack is the initiative, courage and forthcoming attitude to impose myself. I'm not trying to pick out faults in me, but just viewing it as probably an overfunctioned strength as what i pointed out in earlier posts. We all need to improve, and that is something which needs some finetuning. Sometimes i just feel that i'm engulfed by an avalanche of thoughts that are dichotomous, like a raging debate enacting in me almost unceasingly, obscuring my clear thinking, but most fatal of all, delaying response time and stunting spontaneity. No one is perfect, everyone behaves differently, and certainly we all have the capability to mould our character and predisposition through subsequent learning and conditionings. I think the most important gift of life that a person cannot loses is his self-esteem. It provides the basis for self-recognition, acceptance and towards a positive perception of our environment. Being the building block of our emotions, any dent or scratch is largely felt. Scars and wounds heal ever so slowly, leaving immeasurable chronic afflictions on our well-being. To let go is one thing, to forget is another. Sometimes its just like a birthmark, which cannot be erased. So move on? Yes, find other meanings in life. Just like piecing a jigsaw puzzle. Find another piece, focus on other details, and recreate ourselves. Redefine our existence.
One question which i always ask myself, in a somewhat critical way: Will you respond to something which yields no echo? Answer calls where there is no caller (or maybe just very faint replies probably) at the other end?
This question can be intepreted in many ways. To some, in the most direct, literal and no-brainer way, it is an obvious no. Come on, it makes sense to put down the phone when u said hello for the umpteen time and no sound is heard. It is preposterous to continue talking, or behaving like an enthusiastic individual to a seemingly "inanimate" party unless u are a lunatic. That's it. But if u dwell deeper into the depths of my question, it might give u a headache. Life is at crossroads. All the time. Just like what is captured on the header of my blog. Every move we take each step has a significance, and contributes directly or indirectly, to the world before us, and determine to an extent, be it infinitesimal or colossal, to the prospects and possibilities of our future. Ok, let it not sound so bombastic and hard to comprehend. In short, many say live in the present. Cherish the present. Seize the moment. Ok, whatever. Back to the question. When u cant imagine the outcome, or rather i should say if u are uncertain about something, will u advance in that direction based on a falsified imaginative prospect which u drafted in your mind (a dream people might say). Not saying that it is always a false hope, but humans are secure people, we desire for appreciation, certainty and affirmability.
Our thoughts play tricks on us. They can reward us, and can punish us. They can torture us. They can manipulate us. They can deceive us. Because we allowed it to. I have to admit we are all victims of our thoughts, especially when it comes to the negative effects that arise from it. In life we need a grip. Not just any ordinary grip, but this grip is intangible, and the source of this grip is the degree of our core acceptance. What can affect us, and what will not. What we choose to believe and what we choose not to. Ideas are everywhere, but what we choose to believe in is real. It's influence is overwhelming, into the nooks and crannies of our thoughts, especially evident in those reflexive, involuntary thoughts. Scary, arent they?
Ok i shall not damp the festive mood by posting such a philosophical entry. As much as i have problems, everyone has their problems. Lets find the other jigsaw pieces of our lives, lets play it a step at a time. Eventually, the puzzle will be formed. Life's greatest challenge is not the end product of the puzzle itself, but how we choose to piece the puzzle together. In the process lies everlasting joy and fulfilment. Its up to us.
Over and above, i would like to wish all a happy CNY!
One question which i always ask myself, in a somewhat critical way: Will you respond to something which yields no echo? Answer calls where there is no caller (or maybe just very faint replies probably) at the other end?
This question can be intepreted in many ways. To some, in the most direct, literal and no-brainer way, it is an obvious no. Come on, it makes sense to put down the phone when u said hello for the umpteen time and no sound is heard. It is preposterous to continue talking, or behaving like an enthusiastic individual to a seemingly "inanimate" party unless u are a lunatic. That's it. But if u dwell deeper into the depths of my question, it might give u a headache. Life is at crossroads. All the time. Just like what is captured on the header of my blog. Every move we take each step has a significance, and contributes directly or indirectly, to the world before us, and determine to an extent, be it infinitesimal or colossal, to the prospects and possibilities of our future. Ok, let it not sound so bombastic and hard to comprehend. In short, many say live in the present. Cherish the present. Seize the moment. Ok, whatever. Back to the question. When u cant imagine the outcome, or rather i should say if u are uncertain about something, will u advance in that direction based on a falsified imaginative prospect which u drafted in your mind (a dream people might say). Not saying that it is always a false hope, but humans are secure people, we desire for appreciation, certainty and affirmability.
Our thoughts play tricks on us. They can reward us, and can punish us. They can torture us. They can manipulate us. They can deceive us. Because we allowed it to. I have to admit we are all victims of our thoughts, especially when it comes to the negative effects that arise from it. In life we need a grip. Not just any ordinary grip, but this grip is intangible, and the source of this grip is the degree of our core acceptance. What can affect us, and what will not. What we choose to believe and what we choose not to. Ideas are everywhere, but what we choose to believe in is real. It's influence is overwhelming, into the nooks and crannies of our thoughts, especially evident in those reflexive, involuntary thoughts. Scary, arent they?
Ok i shall not damp the festive mood by posting such a philosophical entry. As much as i have problems, everyone has their problems. Lets find the other jigsaw pieces of our lives, lets play it a step at a time. Eventually, the puzzle will be formed. Life's greatest challenge is not the end product of the puzzle itself, but how we choose to piece the puzzle together. In the process lies everlasting joy and fulfilment. Its up to us.
Over and above, i would like to wish all a happy CNY!
January 21, 2008
Its not over, yet
思到如今难以令人忘怀，敏感之心为何如此倔强。落叶归根何忧之有，优柔寡断必成隐忧。
Some things just cant be left undone or not adequately handled. There are imperatives in life. But in front of me is an obstacle, a mental and psychological obstacle that hinders my long term functioning. Now it seems that though there are many rational things that i do in life, there is that fair bit of weakness in me that can lead to a disruptive lifestyle and thinking if it is allowed to consume my soul. Very abstract, complex, and hard to comprehend. But i know the answer is unbelievably simple, yet astonishing hard for me to get it.
Let it be there, but not for long. Its not over, yet.
Some things just cant be left undone or not adequately handled. There are imperatives in life. But in front of me is an obstacle, a mental and psychological obstacle that hinders my long term functioning. Now it seems that though there are many rational things that i do in life, there is that fair bit of weakness in me that can lead to a disruptive lifestyle and thinking if it is allowed to consume my soul. Very abstract, complex, and hard to comprehend. But i know the answer is unbelievably simple, yet astonishing hard for me to get it.
Let it be there, but not for long. Its not over, yet.
January 02, 2008
And here it comes, 2008
Oh that we were there. The familiar carolings ushered in the new year and bade farewell to the somewhat lacklustre year of 2007. To many, it signify the beginning of a great new outlook to life, with the setting of fantastic resolutions, allowing time to cast the final verdict when the christmas trees are here again this year. Everyone likes the idea of setting goals and resolutions, but similarly loathe and grudge the incompetence of the self to achieve what has been laid out. For me, some goals were accomplished, and some were leftovers for this year.
To recap my 2007, i think i've made friends who have always been supportive and there for me, though not a bunch (cos i think its impossible to have so many, in this case, quality is inversely proportional to quantity), or maybe the law of the conservation of friendship (ps calvin now this law works here :P). Good times we had, ranging from having a simple meal, to enjoying a game of badminton, xbox game, or the intensely meaningful shortlived but yet gratifying moment on 24th night at ritz carlton caroling with vj with eugene and calvin. Any further description i'll be revealing my personal life here haha.
Pink and Green have never been so clearly defined in my life. Any color blindness would have been instantly cured by this miracle remedy composed of three alphabets O,R and D. Army has been a great learning experience, i shall not deny for once, and accord merits to what i have been through. Due to sensitive issues, i shall not reveal the doings of my units which underpins my reasoning for the so called beneficial experience. Even in the darkest moments of mcing to the garang ones like duties, i'm glad that i've been there done that. Although there is always an opportunity cost, it is always good to have variation in life, just like there is always diversity in nature. You cant always go on a holiday to malaysia only and proclaim that u are a travel enthusiast. Similarly, you cant have all the ups in life being a life enthusiast.
The last 2 months of the years were spent working as a temporary admin assistant in 2 companies at raffles place. Monotonous the work was, but the work experience retained. At least i now know that i will never ever step into these jobs again.
And now for the new year. To strengthen those relationships i've made with close friends and to proceed on the next phase of my life. Relief teaching. Well a couple more of resolutions, but it shall not see the light here. Like what the army said, its Top Secret :)
Lastly, i like to share a definition of 温馨 as read from DuZhe (a magazine):
温馨，不是设计与布置的结果，不是刻意营造出来的。它储存在寻常人们所过的寻常日子里，偶一闪现，转瞬即逝，融解在寻常日子的交替中。它并没有消失，而是在光阴和岁月中渐渐沉淀，等待我们不经意间回想它。
Happiness and comfort need not be through deeds of substantial magnitude, for those are often transient and lack lustre. Instead, if its dosage be small, slow releasing, yet incessant, how nice will life be?
Haha ok i should stop dreaming.
To recap my 2007, i think i've made friends who have always been supportive and there for me, though not a bunch (cos i think its impossible to have so many, in this case, quality is inversely proportional to quantity), or maybe the law of the conservation of friendship (ps calvin now this law works here :P). Good times we had, ranging from having a simple meal, to enjoying a game of badminton, xbox game, or the intensely meaningful shortlived but yet gratifying moment on 24th night at ritz carlton caroling with vj with eugene and calvin. Any further description i'll be revealing my personal life here haha.
Pink and Green have never been so clearly defined in my life. Any color blindness would have been instantly cured by this miracle remedy composed of three alphabets O,R and D. Army has been a great learning experience, i shall not deny for once, and accord merits to what i have been through. Due to sensitive issues, i shall not reveal the doings of my units which underpins my reasoning for the so called beneficial experience. Even in the darkest moments of mcing to the garang ones like duties, i'm glad that i've been there done that. Although there is always an opportunity cost, it is always good to have variation in life, just like there is always diversity in nature. You cant always go on a holiday to malaysia only and proclaim that u are a travel enthusiast. Similarly, you cant have all the ups in life being a life enthusiast.
The last 2 months of the years were spent working as a temporary admin assistant in 2 companies at raffles place. Monotonous the work was, but the work experience retained. At least i now know that i will never ever step into these jobs again.
And now for the new year. To strengthen those relationships i've made with close friends and to proceed on the next phase of my life. Relief teaching. Well a couple more of resolutions, but it shall not see the light here. Like what the army said, its Top Secret :)
Lastly, i like to share a definition of 温馨 as read from DuZhe (a magazine):
温馨，不是设计与布置的结果，不是刻意营造出来的。它储存在寻常人们所过的寻常日子里，偶一闪现，转瞬即逝，融解在寻常日子的交替中。它并没有消失，而是在光阴和岁月中渐渐沉淀，等待我们不经意间回想它。
Happiness and comfort need not be through deeds of substantial magnitude, for those are often transient and lack lustre. Instead, if its dosage be small, slow releasing, yet incessant, how nice will life be?
Haha ok i should stop dreaming.
December 25, 2007
灯火阑珊处
I just googled the title and came across this very interesting yet philosophical entry. Its in chinese. There wasn't any author to it. In traditional chinese though :P Its here.
Quoting the last paragraph so beautifully and meaninfully expressed,
众里寻他千百度﹐幕然回首﹐那人卻在燈火闌珊處。喜歡，就是淡淡的愛；愛，就是深深的喜歡。人不會因為获得許多愛而觉得人生有意義，卻會因為付出許多愛而越肯定生命的价值。魚說：你看不見我的泪水，因為我在水中....水說：我能感觉到妳的泪，只因妳在我的心中....
Very poetic and an apt description.
Ok, on a lighter note, this christmas. On the contrary to the past, i only went to carol with VJ at Ritz Carlton on Christmas eve. It was under the generous accompaniment of eugene and calvin. Many people would have asked me why not carol with vc. And why only carol one time? Missing out on the grand reunion?
I will dish out my answers for those who want to know it. Here you go. Discounting all my whims and fancies which would definitely provide you a cheap and inexcusable explanation, i want you to understand that the reason transcends that. Its about the meaning of christmas to me. I feel that caroling should not be done excessively. As i say again, its my opinion, so you can fathom for all you like, and yet return dazzled and frustrated. Too bad. Why? Because christmas should be joyful and meaningful, and to me, to be honest, caroling has lost its original beauty. The season is indeed one to rejoice, but not by caroling incessantly. Once, or twice, is enough for me. To get immersed in that merry making moment or u could say magical moment just for that half or 1 hour suffice for me. now why not with vc as many would have asked. let me give u some clues. attachment, feeling, togetherness. Ok i guess that would have answered it. Next up, why no grand reunion? At first wanted to hear, not to sing. But i concluded that there was no point to face the mass of singers anymore since what i want is neither the festive mood nor the nice carols. Been there done that. The only reason i tried giving myself to sing was the dedication. But again, dedication to something whose worth is diminishing? What do i get out from it? the joy of singing? Pls, i already got that through caroling on the eve, and through all i got from 6 years of choral life. I dont want to explain any further. maybe i dont even need to in the first place. But it is something in my heart which should be vented out.
Ok besides that, the last week of the year is a gd time for reflection and thoughts. I didnt had much time to do that, but as for now i do have some thoughts. I had an aim last year around this time. It was to stay out of my comfort zone and explore new areas of my life. Well, looking back, i wouldnt say it is a failure, but just lacking lustre. Insignificant achievements, and i have still been living in that day to day mentality. Goals are rarely long term, short term goals short of a handful as well. I have been very reactive to people's demands. So i guess i would grade it like a 3/10.
But yet there are things which i have gained this year. Some wonderful friends, valuable relationships, and progress in the way i view things. I admit my weakness is still pretty much there, but quoting the counsellor Hanna, she said that a weakness is an overfunctioned strength. Well, everything is just the balance isnt it?
All emotions are acceptable. Do not be excessively worked up or feel depressed/bad for what you are feeling now. Everything happened for a reason. Just like everything has its pros and cons, every crisis has its takeaways. The hardest task a rational human has is managing his irrational emotions. Emotions are like bountiful surges of energy, active, explosive, and unadulterated. Give them space, and they'll engulf you, manage them, and they'll work so nicely for you. I admit that with regards to the above, i'm just like the rational man trying to manage my emotions which are in a disarray at times. But thats where challenges seem to surface, and avenues of courage lurk so closely ever to u. Cherish these opportunities to triumph, to grow and to be free. They dont guarantee that u dont fall again, on the contrary, they muse at the crisis that comes along again. They love to see u coming back on your feet, and have confidence in you doing so. Everytime you do so, ur energy level is raised, and the more you are emboldened and live life to the fullest. People say that obstacles are opportunities in disguise, but i say why the disguise? Must everything that hurt be bad? Must anything that fails be faulty?
The caudron of emotions boiling inside us will never cease, just like how raging fires are hard to totally extinguish. They come and go again, and there's no uprooting it because emotions are part of humans, to ignore it is simply hiding in the closet when danger approaches. No matter how hot the caudron is, we must possess the ability to chill our body, no matter how adverse the conditions are, we must be able to weather it. Let not the temporary stress batter us, for the strength that is needed to pluck us up lies in where it is hard hit, where it is the most painful. It may hurt, it may bleed, but it will heal, and it will thrive. We got to believe in it. No matter how traumatic you will feel, life moves on, and yet another problem comes bugging you.
I hope through the above writing i am able to inspire myself, and people who feel likewise. i dont know why am i comforting myself, but yet it always does happen. How much i actually learn from my own placating is yet another story. But for now, i feel better, and i hope you all do.
All is not gone. What appears lost is not.
Quoting the last paragraph so beautifully and meaninfully expressed,
众里寻他千百度﹐幕然回首﹐那人卻在燈火闌珊處。喜歡，就是淡淡的愛；愛，就是深深的喜歡。人不會因為获得許多愛而觉得人生有意義，卻會因為付出許多愛而越肯定生命的价值。魚說：你看不見我的泪水，因為我在水中....水說：我能感觉到妳的泪，只因妳在我的心中....
Very poetic and an apt description.
Ok, on a lighter note, this christmas. On the contrary to the past, i only went to carol with VJ at Ritz Carlton on Christmas eve. It was under the generous accompaniment of eugene and calvin. Many people would have asked me why not carol with vc. And why only carol one time? Missing out on the grand reunion?
I will dish out my answers for those who want to know it. Here you go. Discounting all my whims and fancies which would definitely provide you a cheap and inexcusable explanation, i want you to understand that the reason transcends that. Its about the meaning of christmas to me. I feel that caroling should not be done excessively. As i say again, its my opinion, so you can fathom for all you like, and yet return dazzled and frustrated. Too bad. Why? Because christmas should be joyful and meaningful, and to me, to be honest, caroling has lost its original beauty. The season is indeed one to rejoice, but not by caroling incessantly. Once, or twice, is enough for me. To get immersed in that merry making moment or u could say magical moment just for that half or 1 hour suffice for me. now why not with vc as many would have asked. let me give u some clues. attachment, feeling, togetherness. Ok i guess that would have answered it. Next up, why no grand reunion? At first wanted to hear, not to sing. But i concluded that there was no point to face the mass of singers anymore since what i want is neither the festive mood nor the nice carols. Been there done that. The only reason i tried giving myself to sing was the dedication. But again, dedication to something whose worth is diminishing? What do i get out from it? the joy of singing? Pls, i already got that through caroling on the eve, and through all i got from 6 years of choral life. I dont want to explain any further. maybe i dont even need to in the first place. But it is something in my heart which should be vented out.
Ok besides that, the last week of the year is a gd time for reflection and thoughts. I didnt had much time to do that, but as for now i do have some thoughts. I had an aim last year around this time. It was to stay out of my comfort zone and explore new areas of my life. Well, looking back, i wouldnt say it is a failure, but just lacking lustre. Insignificant achievements, and i have still been living in that day to day mentality. Goals are rarely long term, short term goals short of a handful as well. I have been very reactive to people's demands. So i guess i would grade it like a 3/10.
But yet there are things which i have gained this year. Some wonderful friends, valuable relationships, and progress in the way i view things. I admit my weakness is still pretty much there, but quoting the counsellor Hanna, she said that a weakness is an overfunctioned strength. Well, everything is just the balance isnt it?
All emotions are acceptable. Do not be excessively worked up or feel depressed/bad for what you are feeling now. Everything happened for a reason. Just like everything has its pros and cons, every crisis has its takeaways. The hardest task a rational human has is managing his irrational emotions. Emotions are like bountiful surges of energy, active, explosive, and unadulterated. Give them space, and they'll engulf you, manage them, and they'll work so nicely for you. I admit that with regards to the above, i'm just like the rational man trying to manage my emotions which are in a disarray at times. But thats where challenges seem to surface, and avenues of courage lurk so closely ever to u. Cherish these opportunities to triumph, to grow and to be free. They dont guarantee that u dont fall again, on the contrary, they muse at the crisis that comes along again. They love to see u coming back on your feet, and have confidence in you doing so. Everytime you do so, ur energy level is raised, and the more you are emboldened and live life to the fullest. People say that obstacles are opportunities in disguise, but i say why the disguise? Must everything that hurt be bad? Must anything that fails be faulty?
The caudron of emotions boiling inside us will never cease, just like how raging fires are hard to totally extinguish. They come and go again, and there's no uprooting it because emotions are part of humans, to ignore it is simply hiding in the closet when danger approaches. No matter how hot the caudron is, we must possess the ability to chill our body, no matter how adverse the conditions are, we must be able to weather it. Let not the temporary stress batter us, for the strength that is needed to pluck us up lies in where it is hard hit, where it is the most painful. It may hurt, it may bleed, but it will heal, and it will thrive. We got to believe in it. No matter how traumatic you will feel, life moves on, and yet another problem comes bugging you.
I hope through the above writing i am able to inspire myself, and people who feel likewise. i dont know why am i comforting myself, but yet it always does happen. How much i actually learn from my own placating is yet another story. But for now, i feel better, and i hope you all do.
All is not gone. What appears lost is not.
December 09, 2007
Life's So Much Like Music
Sorry for the long period of absence. I wanted to post something before Nov ends, but didn't know what to write about. I guess i should not be cooking up anything or force myself to put in a philosophical entry. That would be an obligation, not out of free will. Sometimes, blogging just has that little pressure on me. When my blog's not updated, i do feel that life has somewhat been stagnant. Perhaps its a marker to indicate that i have progressed in life, so somehow when i'm out of ideas to blog i feel that life has never really advanced. haha weird compulsive feeling.
Well, back to what i thought of writing this time. Throughout these 2 years of my life, erm i mean NS, i've beginning to hear more of Guang Liang's songs. Loving music yet not listening much to chinese/eng pop songs, the first song that mesmerized me was Tong Hua. That was just before i entered army. When i finished my BMT, another song of his eased in to my favs. "Tian Tang" That was when i just entered sispec. I remembered listening to it almost every weekend after i book out. It gives me a very nostalgic and reluctant feeling (to book in) indeed. It was very self-delusive. But i enjoyed every moment of this delusion. I can vividly rmb that every book in was at the pick up point opposite boon lay, and we would fall in in CV, counting strength, awaiting a week of tough training and fatigue. To think that booking out would still be a far cry away.
Then after that in signal institute and 2 sig bn i continued with these 2 songs. But it was when i went to my current unit that i started listening to "Yue Ding". Another of guang liang's romantic everlasting kind. I mean his specialty is love and romance kind of songs but a couple of selected songs are just so etched deeply in my mind. They endear so closely to my soul and resonate with my emotions. Maybe it points to some kind of inadequacy or whatever the psychologists like to make their inferences. But no doubt the songs are enchanting. Then after that i got an iPod, and i began to download more of his songs.
都是你，少年，海边 etc. Towards my ORD i found another great song. a duet by 江美琪 and Guang Liang entitled 对你有感觉. Very symbolic and meaningful to me. Till now, this is still the fav, unless otherwise overtaken by another one (haha, must put disclaimer :P) I think it will continue to stay forever, cos if its my fav, it'll still be in my playlist! Guang liang came out with a new album which i havent got the time to go down and shop for it. Maybe i should one day.
Ok now about what i have been doing the past few days. Work and work! haha. Plus one tuition kid. That's about it. It's been great going out with people who i've not seen in ages :) Dec is here again! Much to my pleasure and displeasure. Time has passed in the blink of an eye, not as if it's surprising. I recalled how eager i wanted dec to come so i could ORD quickly, yet when i am at dec, i feel that a new year is approaching, and with some regrets i cruised through the year. Well, let's not dig into it alright, i will take it out on myself.
Thats all for now! Looking forward to the holidays (hari raya, not so much of christmas though!
fyi, all the songs can be heard from the stickam player below hehe :P
Well, back to what i thought of writing this time. Throughout these 2 years of my life, erm i mean NS, i've beginning to hear more of Guang Liang's songs. Loving music yet not listening much to chinese/eng pop songs, the first song that mesmerized me was Tong Hua. That was just before i entered army. When i finished my BMT, another song of his eased in to my favs. "Tian Tang" That was when i just entered sispec. I remembered listening to it almost every weekend after i book out. It gives me a very nostalgic and reluctant feeling (to book in) indeed. It was very self-delusive. But i enjoyed every moment of this delusion. I can vividly rmb that every book in was at the pick up point opposite boon lay, and we would fall in in CV, counting strength, awaiting a week of tough training and fatigue. To think that booking out would still be a far cry away.
Then after that in signal institute and 2 sig bn i continued with these 2 songs. But it was when i went to my current unit that i started listening to "Yue Ding". Another of guang liang's romantic everlasting kind. I mean his specialty is love and romance kind of songs but a couple of selected songs are just so etched deeply in my mind. They endear so closely to my soul and resonate with my emotions. Maybe it points to some kind of inadequacy or whatever the psychologists like to make their inferences. But no doubt the songs are enchanting. Then after that i got an iPod, and i began to download more of his songs.
都是你，少年，海边 etc. Towards my ORD i found another great song. a duet by 江美琪 and Guang Liang entitled 对你有感觉. Very symbolic and meaningful to me. Till now, this is still the fav, unless otherwise overtaken by another one (haha, must put disclaimer :P) I think it will continue to stay forever, cos if its my fav, it'll still be in my playlist! Guang liang came out with a new album which i havent got the time to go down and shop for it. Maybe i should one day.
Ok now about what i have been doing the past few days. Work and work! haha. Plus one tuition kid. That's about it. It's been great going out with people who i've not seen in ages :) Dec is here again! Much to my pleasure and displeasure. Time has passed in the blink of an eye, not as if it's surprising. I recalled how eager i wanted dec to come so i could ORD quickly, yet when i am at dec, i feel that a new year is approaching, and with some regrets i cruised through the year. Well, let's not dig into it alright, i will take it out on myself.
Thats all for now! Looking forward to the holidays (hari raya, not so much of christmas though!
fyi, all the songs can be heard from the stickam player below hehe :P
November 22, 2007
在那远方
在那远方我仿佛听见你的呼唤，你的慰问。虽然遥远，但却清晰。在感情王海里，是那么特殊，那么真诚。或许是我自己胡乱猜想，也许根本就没这回事。感觉上是在自欺欺人，但也不愿意这样。心中那么混浊，生命似乎不能有所期盼。对于我周边的事，我似乎总是不能搞清楚，做清楚。我不想这样，但又一筹莫展。一线线希望，恐怕将随着我的无奈而遗憾离去，一场欢喜一场空。
Next, temp work hasn't been anything fun at all. To say the least, it silences the drive in me to do more productive work. But it was my choice in the first place, so i have no rights to reproach myself. All i can do is to see how time can be better utilised, how emotions can be better managed. As quoted from a few posts back ago, life after ORD wouldn't be as easy as expected. There are challenges in every phase of our life, to avoid it is tantamount to cowardice. To grudge is to reinforce the discomfort we face, and to sulk and get depressed is to weaken oneself even before the battle starts. It is inevitable, so face it.
Next, temp work hasn't been anything fun at all. To say the least, it silences the drive in me to do more productive work. But it was my choice in the first place, so i have no rights to reproach myself. All i can do is to see how time can be better utilised, how emotions can be better managed. As quoted from a few posts back ago, life after ORD wouldn't be as easy as expected. There are challenges in every phase of our life, to avoid it is tantamount to cowardice. To grudge is to reinforce the discomfort we face, and to sulk and get depressed is to weaken oneself even before the battle starts. It is inevitable, so face it.
November 11, 2007
Emotional Dysfunction
好景不常在，好花不常开，天有不测之风云，人有旦夕祸福.
Some things are just borne to be beyond our control. But some things are. Well, when one's health is not optimum, one realises how important it is. Humans are said to be the smart, but yet they need the alarm bell to resonate through their ears to send a message across. This shows how immature we are emotionally, though intellectually we might be far superior than any other species. Aren't human relations the same? They are complex, untouchables, and of course unfathomable.
You can't impose something on someone, cannot coerce them to feel happy, and most of all you cannot dictate their emotions. Us, being the external environment to an individual, might at best provide a stimulus, upon which it is incumbent on the individual's receptors to discern and interpret beneficial messages sent across, and of course act on it hopefully. Sometimes u might feel that ur receptors are just one of a kind, or maybe they are like antibiotic resistant bacteria which have developed immunity in our body. They are wilful and impervious to a particular kind of stimulus. That is why the onset of nagging having little or no effect on people, recalcitrants unable to cast off their delinquency, or even simple humans like us unable to get on with our lives in the desirable way we want.
This phenomenon is the underlying cause of procrastination. It is the sole detriment of insufficient motivation, or for people who find it always difficult to stick to a preplanned schedule. They often give excuses to cover up their incompetencies and inept. Well, our body always have a kind of feedback mechanism which is self-defensive. When u are slightly out of equilibrium, for example, u are slightly late, behind schedule, or score lesser marks then expected in an exam, the conscious mind would seek to provide mitigating reasons to legitimise our errors, recomposing ourselves. This is of course if the deviation is found to be within our threshold of acceptance. But beyond this threshold, most of us would plunge into emotional roller coasters, experiencing depression, grief, and despondency. In the long term, it might be mood swings, irritability and prolonged mental illnesses.
We have to rein in the situation. We have to get in control of ourselves. I guess in some of my ancient posts i have touched on concepts like getting out of your own mind frame, isolating our emotions, and also on a change in stimulus. But with my personal experience, these are all not so easily achieved. Why? These changes are lacking in a rudimental purpose. The dearth of a substantial philosophy for the change. Yes, if u get it now, the question to ask is: Why change? Can't i allow myself to live around like this? If u feel intuitively that things should not carry on like this but yet u feel unable to initiate this change, seek help from those around you. Look at some of the people who are living the lifestyle that u desire to change for. Mix around with them more often, and ask if they could help you with adapting their kind of lifestyle.
Many people claim words are like arrows, they pierce through emotions. But yet words fail terribly when it comes to inspiring a person feeling helpless, unmotivated, and disenchanted. Action speak louder than words. Lead the way. Provide help by getting the person involve in his or her change. Let the person feel the love and purpose of the journey of what he seeks to achieve.
Just like a gun without bullets or a chef without his ingredients, an action without purpose seems at best half hearted and inefficient. At worse, it looks just like a balloon released freely allowing air inside to escape. It looks silly, and unleashes an avalanche of consequences which are mostly emotional, psychological and spiritual. This continues to torment our soul, grinds our determination, and debilitates our resolve towards the problem. A vicious cycle could be set up if subsequent attempts to solve the problem does not identify with a rooted purpose.
So tackle the problem at its roots. This is usually the hardest part and what people preconceive as the dormant and unproductive phase. But that is actually the most valuable and indispensable period. We need to generate a reason to drive our subsequent actions. And such inner soul-searchin as they call it should not be rushed. First let your soul be free of worries. Tell yourself that nothing in life should ever worry you so much, because life itself is abundant, and you are larger than any phase, situation, obstacle, predicament or relation in life. Should any part of it collapses, life, just like time, passes, and would not empathise with you. Learn to think about life as a whole, not just being so concerned about ourselves NOW. (Warning: This is obviously easier to write in words than to put in action). But do try :)
The above is just my humble opinion, or rather some insights which spawned over these few days. I hope the above does provide some form of enlightenment. If you do have disputes about my perceptions, feel free to bring it out. As i said, its just my opinion. To those who genuinely seek help, i tried my best.
Some things are just borne to be beyond our control. But some things are. Well, when one's health is not optimum, one realises how important it is. Humans are said to be the smart, but yet they need the alarm bell to resonate through their ears to send a message across. This shows how immature we are emotionally, though intellectually we might be far superior than any other species. Aren't human relations the same? They are complex, untouchables, and of course unfathomable.
You can't impose something on someone, cannot coerce them to feel happy, and most of all you cannot dictate their emotions. Us, being the external environment to an individual, might at best provide a stimulus, upon which it is incumbent on the individual's receptors to discern and interpret beneficial messages sent across, and of course act on it hopefully. Sometimes u might feel that ur receptors are just one of a kind, or maybe they are like antibiotic resistant bacteria which have developed immunity in our body. They are wilful and impervious to a particular kind of stimulus. That is why the onset of nagging having little or no effect on people, recalcitrants unable to cast off their delinquency, or even simple humans like us unable to get on with our lives in the desirable way we want.
This phenomenon is the underlying cause of procrastination. It is the sole detriment of insufficient motivation, or for people who find it always difficult to stick to a preplanned schedule. They often give excuses to cover up their incompetencies and inept. Well, our body always have a kind of feedback mechanism which is self-defensive. When u are slightly out of equilibrium, for example, u are slightly late, behind schedule, or score lesser marks then expected in an exam, the conscious mind would seek to provide mitigating reasons to legitimise our errors, recomposing ourselves. This is of course if the deviation is found to be within our threshold of acceptance. But beyond this threshold, most of us would plunge into emotional roller coasters, experiencing depression, grief, and despondency. In the long term, it might be mood swings, irritability and prolonged mental illnesses.
We have to rein in the situation. We have to get in control of ourselves. I guess in some of my ancient posts i have touched on concepts like getting out of your own mind frame, isolating our emotions, and also on a change in stimulus. But with my personal experience, these are all not so easily achieved. Why? These changes are lacking in a rudimental purpose. The dearth of a substantial philosophy for the change. Yes, if u get it now, the question to ask is: Why change? Can't i allow myself to live around like this? If u feel intuitively that things should not carry on like this but yet u feel unable to initiate this change, seek help from those around you. Look at some of the people who are living the lifestyle that u desire to change for. Mix around with them more often, and ask if they could help you with adapting their kind of lifestyle.
Many people claim words are like arrows, they pierce through emotions. But yet words fail terribly when it comes to inspiring a person feeling helpless, unmotivated, and disenchanted. Action speak louder than words. Lead the way. Provide help by getting the person involve in his or her change. Let the person feel the love and purpose of the journey of what he seeks to achieve.
Just like a gun without bullets or a chef without his ingredients, an action without purpose seems at best half hearted and inefficient. At worse, it looks just like a balloon released freely allowing air inside to escape. It looks silly, and unleashes an avalanche of consequences which are mostly emotional, psychological and spiritual. This continues to torment our soul, grinds our determination, and debilitates our resolve towards the problem. A vicious cycle could be set up if subsequent attempts to solve the problem does not identify with a rooted purpose.
So tackle the problem at its roots. This is usually the hardest part and what people preconceive as the dormant and unproductive phase. But that is actually the most valuable and indispensable period. We need to generate a reason to drive our subsequent actions. And such inner soul-searchin as they call it should not be rushed. First let your soul be free of worries. Tell yourself that nothing in life should ever worry you so much, because life itself is abundant, and you are larger than any phase, situation, obstacle, predicament or relation in life. Should any part of it collapses, life, just like time, passes, and would not empathise with you. Learn to think about life as a whole, not just being so concerned about ourselves NOW. (Warning: This is obviously easier to write in words than to put in action). But do try :)
The above is just my humble opinion, or rather some insights which spawned over these few days. I hope the above does provide some form of enlightenment. If you do have disputes about my perceptions, feel free to bring it out. As i said, its just my opinion. To those who genuinely seek help, i tried my best.
November 02, 2007
Double Kill
With double basher you definitely go on for a sweet double kill. Well, first things first. If anyone couldn't figure out what was the second basher, i shall reveal it now. Its just the process of altering the first digit of someone's age from 1 to 2. It is characterised by a painful self-realisation of growing mould, as certainly many would claim that they dont seem to look their age, or that their experience gathered through these 2 decades of existence do not commensurate their current societal recognition. Yes 20. Whether you like it or not, time has never stopped for a second. 6.3072x10^8 seconds has passed. And finally when u sink into reality, u felt as though life has suddenly given you your report card, allowing yourself to register some rude shocks and unanticipated disappointments. I remembered very vividly my last bday as if it were moments ago. Yet the same excitement always permeates our soul for that same day of the year. What is actually the meaning of one's bday? A symbol of growth? An affirmation of our maturity? Or a mere passing of time? Would a day marked out on calendar matter if we did not attach significant meaning to it?
Of course the answer to my last qn is an obvious no, as many would irrefutably claim. So what makes ur bday so special since that day u probably feel happier, eat more, and complain lesser? So what if that day serves as a grim reminder of ur age, and in some instances drives purpose into your life and allow to do some reflection? Don't we need to do constant reflections periodically in our life? Why celebrate? Why rejoice? To hype up our emotions so that we feel so special? And of course amid the greetings and wishes that pour in, u reciprocate by saying thanks. Or is it like a day where impt things happen, for instance anniversary or sth, where u feel so suddenly fairy-like when a friend whom u thought u long lost wished u so, or maybe out of the unexpected? Birthday seems so much like a great deal right?
Ok i'm sorry if the above paragraphs have driven u to a point of loathing my ramblings as well as tweaking ur thoughts on a happy occasion. Pardon me. like everyone else, just treat this as an emotional overdrive as i sorta reflected on the meaning of bdays. But do give it a thought. If everyday someone were to tell u hey today is special, would u cherish it similarly? If you yourself attach significance to the day, can u achieve the same effect?
Ok now. Next up lets talk about ORD. I think the glass at esplanade glass will shatter if existing NSFs were given a chance to scream their lungs out on their desire to ORD. So i gave it an interesting abbreviation: Oppressive Rare Disorder. There are symptoms to that as many can observe. Ranging from grumbling to chao kenging and to AWOLing, the creative juices of NSFs are never challenged. ORD to them is not just a frame of mind. Pink can suddenly be their favourite color, or they can exclaim that the air they breath in camp is fresher when they wield some kind of dusty card kept for 2 years at depot road. Well, so when i got my pink IC i was just like.. woah. Not bad. At least i didnt look that bad back then when i was 15. Any further exclamations i made? No. Just that boring comment. And sorry guys. This is just how boring i am.
So double kill has been sufficiently elaborated on. As many ORDed NSFs said, we have won the war, inspite of many failing battles. Days of living in a cage is gone. Days of living with stripes, bars, enduring seafood and galaxy gazing are fading from our memories. No more.
But something else is growing more prominent ahead. Something which is so uncertain, which doesnt gives u a time frame to an end in it. Something which thrust u to the core of its menacing claws. Welcome back to life. You are just born. A second life awaits. And u are totally clueless. U have to reorientate. If ur dominating streak in NS is to be upsetted by an incoming storm, let me tell you, you are not alone. The clumsy face has just settled in our life. A period where uncertainty becomes ur best companion, and experimenting accounts for majority of ur behaviour. Sounds scary isn't it?
For me, now the most impt thing has been to reorg my life, just like how the ppl in big organisations usually do. But time waits for no one. We have to embark on something tentative as we continue our planning, we must set sail and navigate along the way.
Ok, i really dunno what to write. Although i have lots of thoughts now. Maybe i shall just reiterate the quote to NSFs enduring the wait: "Gather what u can before the cross the river" Because, “过了这个村，就没这个店”
In short, do not disappoint the moment u are living now. Always outlive ur present value. Do not worry about the opportunity cost that comes along everytime u are told to do sth or if u are alr doing sth. As much as time is scarce and precious, not effectively maximising work done in any undertaking allocated during a period of time undermines the very existence of time, and by doing so, we are ruining our chances, our life deteriorates gradually. Respect that everything happens for a reason, and excel in circumstances that befall. To win is not to measure how much we have now, but our potential. For the strength in human nature is always our beliefs and our power of imagination.
Lastly i would like to say, thanks to those who have made my NS very memorable. If we just look at things we learn, it'll definitely be something that we would be able to take back. Treat those negative experiences as learning points. My injury might have been sustained in NS, but learning how to live with it is itself a profound wisdom. For one, life can never be perfect, but can be lived to its fullest. Everyone has his unique way of executing his triumph card.
But of course over and above the seemingly serious and solemn paragraphs, i still have to say that..
Pink is certainly a nice colour :P
OMG, ORD LOH!!
Lastly, some pictures i would like to share with u all:
Firstly, when javascript malfunctions, this is what happens :P
Secondly, even when the most popular social networking website tries to malfunction, it stills retain the truth on it.
Calvin, Cheers to u! For once, i say with my head high, ORD LOH. This is for real, and u will say it soon :)
Of course the answer to my last qn is an obvious no, as many would irrefutably claim. So what makes ur bday so special since that day u probably feel happier, eat more, and complain lesser? So what if that day serves as a grim reminder of ur age, and in some instances drives purpose into your life and allow to do some reflection? Don't we need to do constant reflections periodically in our life? Why celebrate? Why rejoice? To hype up our emotions so that we feel so special? And of course amid the greetings and wishes that pour in, u reciprocate by saying thanks. Or is it like a day where impt things happen, for instance anniversary or sth, where u feel so suddenly fairy-like when a friend whom u thought u long lost wished u so, or maybe out of the unexpected? Birthday seems so much like a great deal right?
Ok i'm sorry if the above paragraphs have driven u to a point of loathing my ramblings as well as tweaking ur thoughts on a happy occasion. Pardon me. like everyone else, just treat this as an emotional overdrive as i sorta reflected on the meaning of bdays. But do give it a thought. If everyday someone were to tell u hey today is special, would u cherish it similarly? If you yourself attach significance to the day, can u achieve the same effect?
Ok now. Next up lets talk about ORD. I think the glass at esplanade glass will shatter if existing NSFs were given a chance to scream their lungs out on their desire to ORD. So i gave it an interesting abbreviation: Oppressive Rare Disorder. There are symptoms to that as many can observe. Ranging from grumbling to chao kenging and to AWOLing, the creative juices of NSFs are never challenged. ORD to them is not just a frame of mind. Pink can suddenly be their favourite color, or they can exclaim that the air they breath in camp is fresher when they wield some kind of dusty card kept for 2 years at depot road. Well, so when i got my pink IC i was just like.. woah. Not bad. At least i didnt look that bad back then when i was 15. Any further exclamations i made? No. Just that boring comment. And sorry guys. This is just how boring i am.
So double kill has been sufficiently elaborated on. As many ORDed NSFs said, we have won the war, inspite of many failing battles. Days of living in a cage is gone. Days of living with stripes, bars, enduring seafood and galaxy gazing are fading from our memories. No more.
But something else is growing more prominent ahead. Something which is so uncertain, which doesnt gives u a time frame to an end in it. Something which thrust u to the core of its menacing claws. Welcome back to life. You are just born. A second life awaits. And u are totally clueless. U have to reorientate. If ur dominating streak in NS is to be upsetted by an incoming storm, let me tell you, you are not alone. The clumsy face has just settled in our life. A period where uncertainty becomes ur best companion, and experimenting accounts for majority of ur behaviour. Sounds scary isn't it?
For me, now the most impt thing has been to reorg my life, just like how the ppl in big organisations usually do. But time waits for no one. We have to embark on something tentative as we continue our planning, we must set sail and navigate along the way.
Ok, i really dunno what to write. Although i have lots of thoughts now. Maybe i shall just reiterate the quote to NSFs enduring the wait: "Gather what u can before the cross the river" Because, “过了这个村，就没这个店”
In short, do not disappoint the moment u are living now. Always outlive ur present value. Do not worry about the opportunity cost that comes along everytime u are told to do sth or if u are alr doing sth. As much as time is scarce and precious, not effectively maximising work done in any undertaking allocated during a period of time undermines the very existence of time, and by doing so, we are ruining our chances, our life deteriorates gradually. Respect that everything happens for a reason, and excel in circumstances that befall. To win is not to measure how much we have now, but our potential. For the strength in human nature is always our beliefs and our power of imagination.
Lastly i would like to say, thanks to those who have made my NS very memorable. If we just look at things we learn, it'll definitely be something that we would be able to take back. Treat those negative experiences as learning points. My injury might have been sustained in NS, but learning how to live with it is itself a profound wisdom. For one, life can never be perfect, but can be lived to its fullest. Everyone has his unique way of executing his triumph card.
But of course over and above the seemingly serious and solemn paragraphs, i still have to say that..
Pink is certainly a nice colour :P
OMG, ORD LOH!!
Lastly, some pictures i would like to share with u all:
Firstly, when javascript malfunctions, this is what happens :P
Secondly, even when the most popular social networking website tries to malfunction, it stills retain the truth on it.
Calvin, Cheers to u! For once, i say with my head high, ORD LOH. This is for real, and u will say it soon :)
October 27, 2007
Double Basher
Ok this might sound a bit familiar to those who play dota. but if u are thinking along those lines, u are erroneously misled :P Can make a guess what i'm referring to? If u cant, oh sorry. haha. double means two, basher means ermm.. maybe u can think of it as happiness. If u get one of them, probably u are my gd frend, if both maybe very gd fren. LOL. well ignore this sudden surge of childishness. I reckon not more than 5 would know it anyway.
The past few days were rather tiring with work. 7 days of temp, then got replaced by perm. Nothing is certain afterall right? I went to calvin's house on thurs to complete fifa 08 on his xbox. The cup as u could see below as known as ORD CUP. But well of course we were knocked out. However, having the indomitable and never say die attitude, we charged ourselves with the motivation from our sch's motto: nil sine labore, hence we embarked on another new cup known as ORD CUP 1. Well, as expected, it failed again. And so of course we persevered. FINALLY, we made it. We reached ORD CUP 3. haha. we did record the finals using calvin's handphone. it can be found at his blog at the stickam player. It was rather a crazy thing to do, but sheer fun we enjoyed. I know many of you, esp those in army who havent ORD, would loathe ORD personnel exclaiming abt it. Esp when u see the months ahead filled with uncertainty and unpredictability.
I made a comment inside the video of the cup final that life after ORD might not be as soothing and pleasant and predictable as compared to life before ORD. I can almost sense a few hard knocks on my pitiful skull. pleaase lend me ur ears? :P My BMT OC (ahem.. Ninja) once told us a phrase which is still carved in my mind. His phrase was: Gather what u can before u cross the river.
Let me give my few dollars worth. (i decided a few cents werent enough to even buy a drink :P) Crossing the river symbolises the current process or the phase of life we are going through. eg, NS-ing, studying, slacking, playing, going out with friends.. etc. It can be as long haul as like a 10 year massive financial plan, or as quick as a 1 hr dota match. Regardless of how we cross this river, be it the simple tribesman way or by ferry or cruise, we are all devoted in our paths to reach the destination. But more often then not, we are over-occupied with the goal and not the journey, the end but not the means, although the ends justify the means.
Success is a journey, not a destination. This cliche lives up to its name because ppl have all cast it aside as a cliche and never give a serious thought about it. I know NS might be tedious and mentally sapping due to our distorted predisposition of serving the nation. (disclaimer: not all of them). But trust me. If u think of how u can better utilise what u are doing to gain sth from it, even playing computer games would yield significant benefits, albeit it might be of different nature. I might probably elaborate on my NS gains after i ORD. Well we shall see how.
For now,i only have one thought in mind. Can u guess? what are u thinking? clue: double basher :)
The past few days were rather tiring with work. 7 days of temp, then got replaced by perm. Nothing is certain afterall right? I went to calvin's house on thurs to complete fifa 08 on his xbox. The cup as u could see below as known as ORD CUP. But well of course we were knocked out. However, having the indomitable and never say die attitude, we charged ourselves with the motivation from our sch's motto: nil sine labore, hence we embarked on another new cup known as ORD CUP 1. Well, as expected, it failed again. And so of course we persevered. FINALLY, we made it. We reached ORD CUP 3. haha. we did record the finals using calvin's handphone. it can be found at his blog at the stickam player. It was rather a crazy thing to do, but sheer fun we enjoyed. I know many of you, esp those in army who havent ORD, would loathe ORD personnel exclaiming abt it. Esp when u see the months ahead filled with uncertainty and unpredictability.
I made a comment inside the video of the cup final that life after ORD might not be as soothing and pleasant and predictable as compared to life before ORD. I can almost sense a few hard knocks on my pitiful skull. pleaase lend me ur ears? :P My BMT OC (ahem.. Ninja) once told us a phrase which is still carved in my mind. His phrase was: Gather what u can before u cross the river.
Let me give my few dollars worth. (i decided a few cents werent enough to even buy a drink :P) Crossing the river symbolises the current process or the phase of life we are going through. eg, NS-ing, studying, slacking, playing, going out with friends.. etc. It can be as long haul as like a 10 year massive financial plan, or as quick as a 1 hr dota match. Regardless of how we cross this river, be it the simple tribesman way or by ferry or cruise, we are all devoted in our paths to reach the destination. But more often then not, we are over-occupied with the goal and not the journey, the end but not the means, although the ends justify the means.
Success is a journey, not a destination. This cliche lives up to its name because ppl have all cast it aside as a cliche and never give a serious thought about it. I know NS might be tedious and mentally sapping due to our distorted predisposition of serving the nation. (disclaimer: not all of them). But trust me. If u think of how u can better utilise what u are doing to gain sth from it, even playing computer games would yield significant benefits, albeit it might be of different nature. I might probably elaborate on my NS gains after i ORD. Well we shall see how.
For now,i only have one thought in mind. Can u guess? what are u thinking? clue: double basher :)
October 17, 2007
Picture Paint A Thousand Words
In memory of my ORD, light years later...Credits to Calvin, Photoshoot of his Fifa 2008 on X Box 360 :)
---Added on 19 Oct---
Well, calvin has also humbly presented the other side of the story on his blog.. well not really the other side. Its like a far off echo, a reveberation. (look up the physics notes for resonance :P)i.e. u can see that calvin's frequency is the same as mine, (thus no damping) and there is maximum transfer of energy :) (pardon the physics, i'm trying to prove my intelligence which was credibly long lost)He aptly summarises the years of NS in 6 letters, brilliantly epitomises the mental state of all NSFs throughout our 2 "hilariously excruciating" (i absolutely have no idea what it means) years. My mind is in an alpha state; it means getting unconsciously high on an illusion, or rather something which shldnt have elicited such a response.
An excerpt from calvin's blog: "...during which he garnered 3 awards- The Reckless Driving Award (RDA), Front Parking Proficiency Award (FPPA) and the Road Shoulder Award (RAA)!!! "
Referring to my driving, i have to confess that it was really hilarious with calvin as my vehicle commander too.. if he was the TP, i would have failed more than anyone in this world had for their driving. LOL :P Well, not so dangerous actually.. we all went back in one piece.. Why??
Simple.
"we are drivers too!"
LOL.
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