Emotional Dysfunction

好景不常在，好花不常开，天有不测之风云，人有旦夕祸福.

Some things are just borne to be beyond our control. But some things are. Well, when one's health is not optimum, one realises how important it is. Humans are said to be the smart, but yet they need the alarm bell to resonate through their ears to send a message across. This shows how immature we are emotionally, though intellectually we might be far superior than any other species. Aren't human relations the same? They are complex, untouchables, and of course unfathomable.

You can't impose something on someone, cannot coerce them to feel happy, and most of all you cannot dictate their emotions. Us, being the external environment to an individual, might at best provide a stimulus, upon which it is incumbent on the individual's receptors to discern and interpret beneficial messages sent across, and of course act on it hopefully. Sometimes u might feel that ur receptors are just one of a kind, or maybe they are like antibiotic resistant bacteria which have developed immunity in our body. They are wilful and impervious to a particular kind of stimulus. That is why the onset of nagging having little or no effect on people, recalcitrants unable to cast off their delinquency, or even simple humans like us unable to get on with our lives in the desirable way we want.

This phenomenon is the underlying cause of procrastination. It is the sole detriment of insufficient motivation, or for people who find it always difficult to stick to a preplanned schedule. They often give excuses to cover up their incompetencies and inept. Well, our body always have a kind of feedback mechanism which is self-defensive. When u are slightly out of equilibrium, for example, u are slightly late, behind schedule, or score lesser marks then expected in an exam, the conscious mind would seek to provide mitigating reasons to legitimise our errors, recomposing ourselves. This is of course if the deviation is found to be within our threshold of acceptance. But beyond this threshold, most of us would plunge into emotional roller coasters, experiencing depression, grief, and despondency. In the long term, it might be mood swings, irritability and prolonged mental illnesses.

We have to rein in the situation. We have to get in control of ourselves. I guess in some of my ancient posts i have touched on concepts like getting out of your own mind frame, isolating our emotions, and also on a change in stimulus. But with my personal experience, these are all not so easily achieved. Why? These changes are lacking in a rudimental purpose. The dearth of a substantial philosophy for the change. Yes, if u get it now, the question to ask is: Why change? Can't i allow myself to live around like this? If u feel intuitively that things should not carry on like this but yet u feel unable to initiate this change, seek help from those around you. Look at some of the people who are living the lifestyle that u desire to change for. Mix around with them more often, and ask if they could help you with adapting their kind of lifestyle.

Many people claim words are like arrows, they pierce through emotions. But yet words fail terribly when it comes to inspiring a person feeling helpless, unmotivated, and disenchanted. Action speak louder than words. Lead the way. Provide help by getting the person involve in his or her change. Let the person feel the love and purpose of the journey of what he seeks to achieve.

Just like a gun without bullets or a chef without his ingredients, an action without purpose seems at best half hearted and inefficient. At worse, it looks just like a balloon released freely allowing air inside to escape. It looks silly, and unleashes an avalanche of consequences which are mostly emotional, psychological and spiritual. This continues to torment our soul, grinds our determination, and debilitates our resolve towards the problem. A vicious cycle could be set up if subsequent attempts to solve the problem does not identify with a rooted purpose.

So tackle the problem at its roots. This is usually the hardest part and what people preconceive as the dormant and unproductive phase. But that is actually the most valuable and indispensable period. We need to generate a reason to drive our subsequent actions. And such inner soul-searchin as they call it should not be rushed. First let your soul be free of worries. Tell yourself that nothing in life should ever worry you so much, because life itself is abundant, and you are larger than any phase, situation, obstacle, predicament or relation in life. Should any part of it collapses, life, just like time, passes, and would not empathise with you. Learn to think about life as a whole, not just being so concerned about ourselves NOW. (Warning: This is obviously easier to write in words than to put in action). But do try :)

The above is just my humble opinion, or rather some insights which spawned over these few days. I hope the above does provide some form of enlightenment. If you do have disputes about my perceptions, feel free to bring it out. As i said, its just my opinion. To those who genuinely seek help, i tried my best.